Just thought you guys might like reading these scenes from The Villain. Paul Lynde was always a hoot.

Kirk Douglas was The Villain (aka) Cactus Jack Slade. Paul Lynde was Nervous Elk (Indian Chief)

N.E: "Why...........does old enemy...Prickly Jack...come to Nerrrrrvous Elk?"

C.J.S: "It's CACTUS Jack..CACTUS Jack Slade. (Starts gestering with his hands while saying) I come to speak with striaght tongue."

N.E: "Tongue.......may be straight, but mouth hide, mannnnnnny sharp teeth."

C.J.S: (Still gestering with his hands) "I seek great Chiefs help, I lost my heart to a girl."

N.E: "Can't you talk without your hands?"

C.J.S: "Yeah well, this fella that's with her, is one big mean critter."

N.E: "How....can this tired old warrier...hellllp?"

C.J.S: "Well, I was hoping Chief, that if you and me, and a bunch of these here Braves, were to pop out sudden-like at her, heh heh, he wouldn't be so likely to start a ruckus."

N.E: "You want nothing, from this maaaan? C.J.S. shakes his head no-no, as Nervous Elk continues with: but woman?"

C.J.S: "Not one thing, oh naturally i'd take the Buckboard, well she couldn't very well ride a Horse dressed like she is....I'd even give 'em my horse. I'm still willing to do 'em kindness."

N.E: "Giving him that horse....no (starts chuckling) kindness." (Indians start laughing at C.J.S's horses expense. Whiskey (C.J.S's horse,) gives them a dirty look. N.E: stops laughing and says: "What in it for......Nerrrrrvous Elk?"

C.J.S: "Scalps."

Nervous Elk starts laughing as he says: "S-s-s-s-scalps.......come now....Many-Stickered-John."

C.J.S: "CACTUS Jack!....CACTUS Jack Slade!"

N.E. laughing as he says: "Whaaaaatever......Scalps.....don't put Beans on the table."

C.J.S: "I'll share the woman."

N.E: "White woman craaaaazy, they all keep one bullet...in gun."

C.J.S: "I heard that. By the way, I've been meaning to ask you what you Indians do, when you capture a white woman?"

N.E: "Nerrrrrvoue Elk not know, craaazy white woman always shoots self before me have chance to find out. Allll except one- by mistake.....shoot Nerrrvous Elk in the Jewels."

C.J.S: "Yeaaaah, I remember....For old times sake...will you help me?"

N.E: "Me like near-sighted elk that made love to Cactus, been stuck before..........We will help."

C.J.S: "I knew I could count on you my friend.....Thanks Chief." C.J.S. walks back towards his horse-Whiskey-who backs away from him and C.J.S says: "Now what's the matter with you?" then steps towards Whiskey who then still steps backwards. C.J.S. now realizes why Whiskey is angrey with him and says: "What's wrong?......ohhhhhhh, I wasn't going to give you away.....come here.........I was just saying...C'ya at the camp."

One of Nervous Elks Indians says: "That man is here to steal money, (as Nervous Elk nods yes) and if you help him, you'd be stealing also."

N.E: "Mmm Hmm."

Indian: "But you've already given your word to the Banker, would you go back on it now?" as N.E. laughs and says: "Ah Haaaa."

Indian: "What about the white man?"

N.E: "Piss on the white man."

It's now nighttime and Cactus Jack Slade is at the Indians camp, wearing a Wolf's hide and smoking the Peace Pipe and coughing, while "war drums" sound throuout the camp. C.J.S. hands the peace pipe to he Indian who walks towards N.E. and says: "Know what Chief, he's going to set the Indian back at least 50 years."

N.E: "I don't know which is worse?.........him or those damn drums. N.E. hands a map with their plan of attack to the Indian and says: "This is the plan of attack, now go over it with your troops."

Indian: "Ok Chief."

N.E: "Good Brave." Nervous Elk approaching C.J.S. saying: "We attack at dawn."

C.J.S: "Why don't we attack now, when they're off guard?"

N.E: "Injuns never attack till dawn."

C.J.S: "I know, but why?"

N.E: "Because night......Injuns too busy pounding....all those (yelling) DUMB DRUMS!!"

You're right!

Not only that but: OWCH!

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Lost are only those, who abandon themselves) Hans-Ulrich Rudel.

Paul Lynde as the Indian was too funny Carl!!
I found the poster of this movie! There were so many big names in this flick!

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This is a pair of Dutch resistance crystal radios, built into a small metal can, and a matchbox. The image is from a postcard bought at a Dutch Resistance Museum in Amsterdam. The matchbox is marked in Swedish, but Swedish matches were sold in Holland for many years..
Scott

Heh heh, you got that right! Everytime I saw Paul Lynde in a scene, he'd crack me up. I also thought that Mel Tillis did a great time as the telegraphist-having to practically sing-to deliver his lines. "She-shes-shes-shes-c-c-c-comin' in the m-m-morning on-on-on the t-t-t-t-train. (now singing) She's comin' in the morning on the train."

Foster Brooks was greeat as the Bank Clerk. Jack Elam too was a hoot. And not to forget Ann Margaret-she was beautiful then and still is now WOW WOW!

The bald guy who played the Indian-that was with Nerrrrrrvous Elk in many scenes is Robert Tissier (SP?) better known for his role in: The Longest Yard-the guy who broke Richard Kiels (Jaws in a few James Bond movies) nose, just for the heck of it.

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Lost are only those, who abandon themselves) Hans-Ulrich Rudel.

Oh yes, Robert Tessier......
I forgot about him, I think I'll have to pull that out and watch it again!

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This is a pair of Dutch resistance crystal radios, built into a small metal can, and a matchbox. The image is from a postcard bought at a Dutch Resistance Museum in Amsterdam. The matchbox is marked in Swedish, but Swedish matches were sold in Holland for many years..
Scott

Robert Tessier was good too. I THINK he also was in a first season episode of: The Fall Guy-the episode where Colt and his Cousin are sent to a Prison to bust someone out (Richard Kiel) to be exact. Anyway, I think Tessier was in that episode. You don't see him in anything these days :-(

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Lost are only those, who abandon themselves) Hans-Ulrich Rudel.

Hey Carl i saw cactus jack many years ago and it seriously cracked me up kirk douglas is funny and jack elam you only have to look at him all the best.Jason

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WHEN YOU GO HOME, TELL THEM OF US AND SAY, FOR YOUR TOMORROW,WE GAVE OUR TODAY. Epitaph on the Kohima memorial .

Hi Jason, yup, they both were funny and I wish that they both made more comedies.

By the way, about Jack Elam, just watch him in Rio Lobo=as Tuscaroras Father. He was a hoot in that Duke movie. Also, he appeared with Duke at least once more-and years before-in the movie: The Comancheros.

Oh and-for two more Westerns that Jack Elam was very good in-try watching both: Support Your Local Sheriff & Support Your Local GUnfighter. Both of these movies starred James Garner w/ Jack Elam as his sidekick. Chuck Connors was in one of these movies (I forget which?) as "the bad guy" and somehow he finds out that either Garner or Elam, had been mistaken for him and had been "living it up" posing as him. The Chuck Connors character was coming to town so he could just see who was aping him and he was going to gun him down. However, during one of the many TnT blasts going on, he had been walking down a street and wound up shooting himself in the foot.

Anyway, that movie is basically a remake of the Gary Cooper classic: Along Came Jones. Not to get too terribly off topic but, Gary Cooper was Jones in that movie. The Jones character, was supposed to be Dan Duryea-who was the baddie in that movie. End result, all three of those movies are hilariously funny.

One more "Off Topic" before I close.

OK, most Duke fans know that Walter Brennan played Stumpy in the John Wayne movie:Rio Bravo. OK, my question is this, who do you think might have been the best Stumpy? Walter Brennan or Jack Elam? This is based on Jack Elam's characterns in Rio Lobo and both of the James Garner movies mentioned above. ;-)) This would be one heck of a hard choice for me to make-as I think that Jack Elam too, would have made one hell of a good Stumpy.

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Lost are only those, who abandon themselves) Hans-Ulrich Rudel.