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A FEW RULES OF COMBAT.

Discussion in 'The Members Lounge' started by Capt.mainwaring, Aug 25, 2004.

  1. Capt.mainwaring

    Capt.mainwaring New Member

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    1. If the enemy is in range, so are you.
    2.Incoming fire has the right of way.
    3. The only thing more accurate than incoming fire, is friendly incoming fire.
    4. Don,t look conspicuous, it draws fire.
    5. Don,t draw fire, it irritates the people around you.
    6. The easy way is always mined.
    7. Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
    8. Try to look important, they may be low on ammo.
    9. Professionals are predictable, it's the amateures that are dangerous.
    10. The enemy invariably attacks on only two occasions:
    a. When you're ready for them.
    b. When you're not.
    11. Teamwork is essential, it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.
    12. Anything you do can get you shot especially if you are doing nothing.
    13. If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.
    14. When the pin is pulled, the grenade is not your friend.
    15. Five second fuses only last for three seconds.
    16. If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid.
    17. Never share a foxhole with someone braver than you.
    18. Make it too tough for the enemy to get inand you can't get out.
    19. Don't ever be first, don't ever be last, and don't volunteer for
    anything.
    20. The Quarter-master has only two sizes, too large and too small.
     
  2. corpcasselbury

    corpcasselbury New Member

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    I love this!!! :lol:
     
  3. GP

    GP New Member

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    21. Tracer works both ways.
    22. Your weapon is made by the cheapest bidder.
     
  4. Christian Ankerstjerne

    Christian Ankerstjerne Member

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    23. If you're en infantrist:
    - If your airforce doesn't accidently bomb your position, your navy will.
    - If your navy doesn't accidently bomb your position, your artillery will.
    - If your artillery doens't accidently bomb your position, your armour will roll over your tent at night.
     
  5. Roel

    Roel New Member

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    This is great stuff mainwaring! Laughed my head off.

    24. If you try to avoid an ambush you will run into another.
     
  6. Christian Ankerstjerne

    Christian Ankerstjerne Member

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    25. Running away the enemy will get you shot as a deserter. Running towards the enemy will get you shot as a traitor. In general, don't run in the military.
     
  7. Mutant Poodle

    Mutant Poodle New Member

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    1. Salute the hated officer, in the field, its a sniper's unspoken courtesy!
    2. The first words a combat engineer will speak in heaven, or hell, oops!
    3. The only stupid question is the one not asked.
     
  8. Nashorn phpbb3

    Nashorn phpbb3 New Member

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    Always funny stuff : Murphy's rules of combat

    Remember, the weapon your firing was made by the lowest bidder
     
  9. Ebar

    Ebar New Member

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  10. Roel

    Roel New Member

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    "Martyn Walters, 21, who was born in Burnley, Lancashire, and now lives in Birmingham, is the loftiest soldier in the Guards' 362-year history."

    Aargh! Lancashire! :lol:
     
  11. Capt.mainwaring

    Capt.mainwaring New Member

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    POST SUBJECT

    IF IT MOVES, SALUTE IT,
    IF IT DOES NOT MOVE, PAINT IT!
     
  12. Capt.mainwaring

    Capt.mainwaring New Member

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    post subject

    SORRY, LAST POST SHOULD HAVE READ-
    "IF IT MOVES, SALUTE IT,
    IF IT DOES NOT MOVE, PICK IT UP,
    IF IT IS TOO BIG TO PICK UP, PAINT IT!!!
     
  13. Ebar

    Ebar New Member

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    Read in the Sunday paper that for the first time since the early sixteen hundreds the Royal Navy is now weaker in combat units than the French Navy. To which I can only comment, WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE KNUCKLEHEADS IN WHITEHALL DOING TO OUR NAVY?????? :evil:
     
  14. Roel

    Roel New Member

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    Or, "is France gearing up for another war?" :grin: Remember, there's two sides to every story. :D
     
  15. Greg Pitts

    Greg Pitts New Member

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    "And may your guns never jam"!

    :smok:
     
  16. Capt.mainwaring

    Capt.mainwaring New Member

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    post subject

    OF COURSE THERE IS A SAYING ABOUT A SAILOR WITH A RIFLE!!
     
  17. Roel

    Roel New Member

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    Can they even use anything that isn't breech-loaded? :lol:
     
  18. corpcasselbury

    corpcasselbury New Member

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    The same thing Bill Clinton did to ours: Screwing it up royally. Not only did he reduce the number of ships in commission, he reduced the Navy's budget to the point where they couldn't even send all of the ready vessels to sea! :angry: How so many people actually believed that this disgrace was fit to be the commander-in-chief of the US Armed Forces is beyond me!
     

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