Limericks Please

Not an easy thing to do. Here are the rules: Funny poetry for children
There will be no mention of Nantucket.

 

This is too much like homework,
Said the forum reader who lurked.
So off to another thread
Cause this one may be dead
"But I may be back like clockwork".

See what 3 minutes creates? ps...did not read the rules to create a childs poem.

 

Obviously.

 

When Poppy creates a new thread
Believe it or not it gets read.
Well, it's no big surprise
That the mods roll their eyes
At some of the things he has said.

 

And on a more serious note:

Two brothers once went off to War
For duty and honor they swore.
Only one did come back
And forever did lack
The innocence that he once bore.

 

I'm getting this out of the way right quick. On advice of my attorney,

The Trustee for this sub-forum is not responsible for the content of any limerick!

(I think it may be a plot by poppy to bring down the forum from within!)

 

There was a young man who had gas
Who walked by a lovely young lass.
With a wince and a grin
He held it all in
'Til his burden could safely be passed.

 

Isn't there another thread on the go on this? I'm sure I am repeating here:
- @Poppy

There once was an old Soldier named Frank.
Whose Language was incredibly Rank.
His breath was so Foul
(His head was his Bowls)
That his humor inevitably Stank.

 

There was a young lady named Etta
Who wanted to wear a tight sweater
Three reasons she had
Keeping warm wasn't bad
But the other two reasons were better!

 

There once was a sculptor named Phideous
Whose sculptures by most were thought hideous
He carved Aphordite
Without even a nightie
And shocked the ultra fastidious

 

Ha!..Well done mate...Good on y'all. Mine was lame, but some goodies came.

 

For our new Moderators:

With Biak and Belasar Mods
Let's hope they don't think themselves gods.
Though they're always around,
The one thing I have found
Is that neither one has the right bod.

 

Oh, admit it. You're flattered, aren't you.

Or do I need to don my asbestos undergarments?

 

Somebody is lucky I'm half blind, otherwise I might push this shiny new button that says "Release the Hounds!"

 

There once were two shiney new mods...
Some would say pretty much Gods...
Now me and you know..
best go with the flow...
and don't tell the world they are sods.

 

Oh crap, I was afraid urqh would find this thread.

 

Belasar and Biak meet
To decide what the forum should eat
There are no more horses
They've gone to the forces
Perhaps we should just ban the meat..

Coffee Biak....two sugars Please Belasar....Now then ww2...where did we leave it...