Quote:
Originally Posted by Kai-Petri
Well, that explains why (s)he had only one ball then...  |
talking of hitlers nuts,this is amusing..
The Beagle Has Landed!
A stirring tale of canine courage from WWII
A small cardboard box hidden away in a dusty storeroom at the Albert Hall
contains a forgotten relic of one of the most remarkable stories to come
out of the second world war. Amazingly, the hero of this story is not a
commando, fighter pilot or sea capta
in, but a tiny dog named Nipper...
London, 1945.
After 6 years of conflict, cracks were beginning to show in the morale of
the British public. During a concert at the Royal Albert Hall, forces'
sweetheart Vera Lynn stepped to the front of the stage and began to sing:
"Hitler. Has only got one ball. The
other. Is in the Albert Hall..." but before she could begin the second
verse, she was interrupted by an angry man in the crowd.
"That's what they keep on telling us," he yelled, "but where is it? I ain't
seen it!" His neighbour stood up and agreed.
"If they'd really got Adolf's knacker, they'd show us the perishin' thing.
I reckons it's all propaganda, an we're losin' this war an' no mistake!"
The crowd soon became an angry mob.
"What do we want? Hitler's ball! When do we want it? Now!" they chanted.
The very next day, Prime Minister Winston Churchill summoned Dambusters
hero Neville Barnes Wallis to his office.
"Professor" he announced gravely, "I cannot overemphasise the importance to
Britain's morale of securing one of the Fuhrer's clockweights." The boffin
was given just one week to mount a mission to seize one of Hitler's
testicles and bring it back to the Albert Hall.
Walking home through Hyde Park, Barnes Wallis puzzled over the problem.
"Hitler's gonads are the most heavily fortified in Europe. His pants are
literally impregnable. No allied soldier could get within 50 miles of them
with a pair of secateurs." Suddenly
, his eyes fell upon a small dog retrieving a rubber ball thrown by its
owner. "By jove!" he cried. "I know how it can be done!"
the professor's brilliant brainwave was to parachute a small dog into
Berlin, where it would penetrate the rigid security around the animal
loving Fuhrer's bunker. After ripping off one of Hitler's nuts, the dog was
to carry it back to England, where it w
ould be displayed to the public at the Albert Hall. Hundreds of dogs were
brought to Aldershot and put through their paces by Barnes Wallis. But it
was a little beagle named Nipper who, through small in stature, stood head
and shoulders above the rest. Du
ring his intensive training for the mission, the plucky fellow never once
failed to sever a dummy pod from the decoy Hitler.
"Well done, lad. I think you're ready," announced Barnes Wallis. "You
parachute into Berlin tonight." The brave little dog wagged his tail
eagerly.
Nipper was taken from Aldershot to Gracie Fields house in Oldham, where he
was given the scent of Hitler's scrotum by sniffing her chin. Then he was
flown in a Halifax bomber deep into enemy territory. At dead of night he
was dropped from 35,000 feet dire
ctly over the Reichstag. "Fetch the ball, boy!" shouted Barnes Wallis above
the roar of the engines as he pulled the beagle's little ripcord.
Will Nipper retrieve the one of the dictators pills?
Will he land? at all?
Who knows, and who cares!
find out in the next exciting installment of
The Beagle has Landed!!!!
"Hitler's" skull actually from female!
Re: "Hitler's" skull actually from female!
Re: "Hitler's" skull actually from female!
Re: "Hitler's" skull actually from female!
Re: "Hitler's" skull actually from female!
