Happy Birthday To Our Commander In Chief

Happy Birthday Otto!!! I love you and can't wait to shower you with gifts today! And no I will not be dressing up like girl hitler again this year.... you really must get a new fantasy!

 

Have a great day, Otto - I must admit, the mind boggles at the thought of those gifts you're going to be showered with......

 

...a female Hitler?

little bit weird dude....but....ok...yea I would too

 

Maybe something more like this...



And to you...

​

 

Happy Birthday,Otto!

 

Happy birthday, Have a great day Otto!

 

Happy birthday mate.

Old enough to need one of these yet?

 

Happy Birthday Otto and thanks for all your help recently.

 

Hail to our Chief! Happy Birthday and best wishes.

 

Sir...Permission to have a Birthday beer for you? Sir!!!

Have a great day!

 

Happy Birthday Otto! Hopefully will visit you with a good gift too!

 

Some nice gifts.........

 

Happy Birthday Otto and many more to come !

 

ah ok Otto..............tell Trouble to leave the mustasche at home, she looks better without it.

hey, anyway Happy birthday kid

and that motorized chair would fit my style right now, wonder if I could hook up my Panzerschreck to that thing somehow

yee haw have a good one man and Miss

 

Happy Birthday to our Grofaz Otto!

Rather than the Birthday Panzer, I present you with
the Naked Japanese Triplets Tiger Crew. Enjoy! (Thanks to Peppy for hosting the image for me.)


Thanks Otto for this forum, I've been enjoying it and learning from it for years now. Cheers to you and Trouble on your special day.

 

Happy birthday good sir, may your wishes come true.


I'd give you a cake... but 'friad my oven broke from the previous cake making ;/

 

First off, I have a question? Why would a female in the employ of the army be wearing an Infantry - piped overseas cap? Damn glad Otto can pick better-lookings ones that THAT ;-0

Otto is sitting on his favorite barstool in his favorite bar (somewhere in the outbacks of greater Canada) and is sitting there nursing on his 5th mug of beer-when he hears a noise and notices 20 members of the Hells-Angels motorcycle gang, enter the bar. They noisily spreadout throuout the bar-kicking other customers outta their way. For THEY are thirsty, andcan't stand to see mere civilians enjoying themselves.

Suddenly, three of the toughest bikers approach the table directly behind where Otto is nursing his rapidly warming beer. Sitting at that table are TWO elderly women gingrly sipping their Shirley Temple drinks and nervously watching the bikers. The bikers claim both women for a tango-like dance-without music playing. The third biker sits at the table and gingerly drinks up both of the remains of the contents of those ladies glasses.

By this time, all of the regular customers are leaving the bar as fast as they can--minus the two ladies being held against their wills--by the swill that are forcing them to dance. The supposed "leader" sitting at that table-notices that Otto has not turned around ro seems to notice anything going on. That leader, focusus both eyes directly to the back of Ottos naked neck. Otto then seems to feel that something is going on ---but does not let them know that. He still calmy sits there sipping on his beer--when Clyde--his pet simeon, comes into the bar and sits down next to him--banging his hairy/meaty fist onto the bar--ordering his own beer.

At that, every biker takes notice of the lone man and ape, sitting together at the bar drinking their beers. One biker--wearing crossed chains (an bandoliers) in a "X" cross his chest--walks up to Otto and his hairy pal. Meanwhile, the two elderly women are having to endure-yet, another dance with their bluejean-dressed partners-and someone hits a jukebox--letting it play, ironically--the Country song: "The Good Guys and the Bad Guys."

"Chains" tells Otto that he hates all apes and tells him to get that filthy-disgusting ape off his favorite bar-stool and outta his favorite bar. Chains, then lights of a Cuban Stogie--quickly smelling up the area. Clyde--hates smoke and reaches overthere and takes the bikers cigar and snuffs it out in a nearby unfinished mug of beer. The biker is surprised but quickly is enraged and makes a leap at Clyde.

Clyde can hold his own and quickly grabs that biker by his balls and squeezes him into un-action. Chains falls to the floor incapacitated. Suddenly, all the opther bikers stop what they were doing and the bar goes silent--except for the Pat Garrett song playing in the background. As the words of the song: "I got up to ask him why, and then he punched me in the eye-then all hell broke loose in that bar" played. Otto--leaped off his stoll-onto it, and whilst in mid-air--managed to rip his shirt free-showing his muscle-rippled body (actually, he was doing his best impression of Bruce Lee) and yelling: aaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy...... and shaking his body making it rustle and shake.

Biker 2,3,4,5, charged Otto but all were very quickly dispatched to that grease-pit in the bikers-world. Bikers 6,7,8,9,10,11 and 12, charged Otto from many directions. Otto had to duck the thrusts of a few poolcues, as well as dodge several balls thrown at him. Try as the bikers might but fail as they did--to hit Otto even once. Otto was by then, more than ready to take on the entire gang. He looked to his left and saw Clydy busy picking the boogers out of the noses of the newly deceased bikers--and eating their boogers. Otto wrinkled his nose at what he saw and even spit out and shokk his head from side-to-side-but one thing happened in that short span of time that Otto never thought about--which was time for the bikers to get some hits on.

One biker--managed to smash and break a pool cue--over Otto's head--only juuuusssst phasing Otto--but incapacitated him long enough for another biker to smash Otto in the tummy with a mug full of beer--which slightly winded Otto--and completely soaked his trousers--which really pissed him off. Otto just gave a "look" at that biker--and that biker knew he was dead. Otto gave a rapid series of yells interspersed with several kicks and Karate-chops. That biker was dead in less time than it took Otto to make the moves.

Bikers-7-12 then mad a charge en-masse--towards Otto's hevily defended position. Otto tensed all of his muscles and made the shaking movements necessary before lashing out on four different directions in the bliink of an eye. Bikers 7-10 were quickly dispatched to their version of Valhalla. 11 and 12, both pulled out their Bowie (Pronounced Booey-not Bow-ie) blades and tried slashing Otto to pieces. Otto jumped and danced from side-to-side avoinding being shreadded but they still managed to slash Otto across the forehead and his chest.

When Otto noticed that, he stood still, gave both bikers a deadly glare-never letting his eyes leave the two (future) dead bikers, as he lowered his right arm down and let his fingers slide through his blood--then lifting his fingers to his mouth and tasting his onw blood--really infuriated Otto. Otto then lashed out and in then in the blink of an eye, two Bowie blades were sticking theough the near severed heads of those two bikers.

The Biuker leader then yelled and told his men to go get Otto.

The remaining 9, charged Otto's position (forgetting about Clyde) and started grabbing for Otto's legs-hoping to incapacitate him long enough to win their fight. But Otto saw through that and made a series of kicks and leaps and was soon out of being surrounded--Clyde in the meantime, grabbed a biker and snapped his neck--then he proceeded to pick his nose-and forgot about the fight.

Bikers-14-19, attacked yet once again and almost had Otto surrounded a second time but--Otto fought his way out of that circle-leaving bikers 14,15,16 and 17, lying dead on the beer and broken glass-covered floor. Biker 18-cheated and pulled out a small .25 cal pistol. With a shit-eating grin on his face-he advanced alone-closer to Otto-making sure he had a round in the chamber and ready-to-fire.

Otto again tensed up all his muscles-making those skin-shaking movements and yelling noises again. As biker 18 approached, Otto noticed a movement from his right-rear area. Biker 19, had Clyde in a choke-hold and with a Bowie knife at his throat. Biker 18, raised his pistol, fired and missed his first shop at 4 feet! 18, fired a second tome but the gun went "click" and he said: "Oh shit" and tried to retreat. Before he could start backing away, Otto smashed a broken cuestick--into the bikers right eye--and that biker died.

Otto's immediate attention then reverted back to his ape-pal-Clyde. But to his astonishment--Clyde managed to escape his predicament by kissing that biker on the mouth--then smashing his balls into the floor. Biker 19 was not going anywhere anytime soon--cept maybe to the hospital or the Police station.

Biker 20 is completely surprised that all of his men were dead or wounded. He stands erect and spreads both arms wide with the palms of his hands showinig and says: "Lord, you make other men out of clay, you make mine, outta shit." Then he turns to leave the bar--and Otto lets him go.

Otto then tells Clyde to go get into the truck--and Clyde leaves to do so. Otto then searches every biker for whatever valueables and monies they might have--and places all of it on the bar--to pay for the damages caused by the fight. Otto then turns, and silently walks out the door-heading for his truck.

As Otto steps into his truck with his simeon pal-Clyde sitting to his left, he places the key into the ignition switch and turns the key. The truck starts up--purring like a kitten. Otto shifts it into first gear, and then into second--and pulls out of the place telling Clyde: "Right turn Clyde," as they turn onto the street and go home.

Happy Birthday Otto ;-)) From Carl, Snoopy, Clyde and the gang.

 

Well actually, you only beat up 19 bikers--remember that Clyde beat up one of them ;-))

Thanks for the compliments and, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!