Bachelor Recipes

Any beans? Want white navy beans. ..Also crock pot friendly? The devil is in the details...I'll ask my old man's recipe soon.

 

Poppy.....as I conclude from the flavor of this discussion....as obese men who read these columns become elderly and less firm in buttocks (as was not the case in some of their youth), they tend to become more vociferous in their flatulance flaunting this readily by boasts from their lowest esophagus.... after the most innocent of meals. As beans have been known to be at the root of offensive methane increases, it behooves you to research on behalf of our lady friends a way to combat this degenerate behavior and vociferous exaggerance. One can do so by including a good measure of ground ginger in each recipe of beans only to the point of being barely detectable as that is the determinate factor of how much is enough. A further reduction of flatulance is to soak the beans an extra measure of time getting rid of the water after so doing. It is still possible for the above men to engage in this ceremony they choose to adhere to, but at least the faint smell of ginger will not be as harmful as the oderous sulfates that seem to originate from the depths of a truly rotten large intestine of which they seem to always and obviously possess.

On the other hand if one chooses to eat beans in a flatulance tournament campfire meeting, all those suggestions can be done away with and a side vegetable of brussel sprouts, asparagus or cabbage will suffice to arm them adequately for the dueling they may enjoy in evening campfire discussion and combat.....but they better keep their distance from the campfire lest they spark a slow burn through clothing that might ignite a methane blevy, leading observers to conclude falsely that spontaneous combustion of the human body is a phenomena to be present in the world of which little is known, yet remains highly speculative thereof.

 

Killin' me......White beans....what kind of savege would add a ham shank to any other kind of bean?.....meathead

 

White beans are fine, but down here white beans are a side dish to jambalaya for the most part. I use them in my Mean Beans recipe, along with red beans, black beans, field peas, black eyed peas, cowboy beans, and whatever other beans you like, but not pork n beans. Speckled butter beans are good too. I use the ham bone from a spiral cut ham with plenty of ham still on it. Also I add cayenne, habanero peppers, or green chilies if I have some. I then add a cup of cooked rice, some cubed pork chops, plenty of chopped up onion, bell pepper, garlic, celery and green onions. I have thrown in some diced potatoes too, but usually there is not that much room in the pot for those. Now that's a bachelor meal for a bachelor and all his bachelor friends.

 

MrVG has a way with words I could never reproduce, or comprehend...lol Kidding VG, love you man. Thinking you just gave a recipe for a Dutch oven...lol..Thanks for your well hidden bits of cooking strategy strategically placed within your wordings..

 

Here's a recipe that will be a great addition to any bachelor's recipe file. It's easy to prepare, fast and tastes great too.

Here's what goes into it:
1 can of cream of chicken soup
1 pack of ramen noodles
1 small can of canned chicken
1 cup of water

Process:
1. heat up the pot and add the cream of chicken soup and water
2. when it comes to a boil, add the noodles and the canned chicken
3. season to taste

About 5 minutes later it's piping hot and time to eat.

I made it last night after coming in from choir practice. Made a slight mess in the kitchen, but that's ok. The taste more than made up for it.

You can add sliced garlic, chopped bell pepper, onion, celery as well, along with any type of hot peppers you have laying around. Cook these items down in the pot with a little oil before step 1. Oh yeah!

 

Yeah, Mr Clint is missed...Thanks for the bump, but there is no recording there B. What were you going to play?

 

Spam spaghetti...Tin of spam...the real stuff not the chopped pork own brands...

Boil spag...

Drain..leave on side

Cut spam into small squares...

Fry quick in big saucepan...oil, and add half tube of Tomatoe paste as the yanks call it..

Stir quick..put in spag...

Stir and serve..

RAF comfort food recipe....

Tomorrow we go back to our old favourite....Egg banjo's...

 

The only recipe I use spam in is a baked bean casserole. ..Pick how many cans of your choice of beans. Add ketchup and mustard to taste in a casserole dish. Season. Cut Spam length wise into enough peices that it will completely top the bean concoction. Add pineapple chunks evenly distributed on top. Bake at 350 until you can't wait any longer...I enjoy the spam being crispy around the edges. That way I forget it's spam.
One of the many recipes I have, that every ingredient comes from a can, and it's fun to do the Russian Matryoshka doll thing. My record is 4 cans. The mushroom can fits in the soup can, soup can into the corn can, corn can into tomato juice can. That felt awesome...Do not ask for that recipe. It is a family secret passed down from my great great uncle T Bone Slim- the original hobo.

 

This is all too fem for me...Pops...a peice of well done steak and a peice of bread...dead horse if you want.

And........your done!

 

Road kill....Badger on toast anyone?

 

I just cooked up a pot of hambalaya. I used ham instead of sausage, and little rice looking pasta thingees instead of the usual par boiled rice. Of course I stuck with the chicken. I always use thigh meat in my dishes. It came out pretty good if I might say so myself.

 

As long as y'all are sharing- broke out the tumble basket that goes on my bbq rotisery. Put some wings/drums/thighs in. Had to stay close and extinguish fat flare ups because left skin on...Some of the smaller pieces managed to find their way out of the basket. Happened last year with the pork ribs too. Will add some wire in order to reduce escape routes. ..Chicken was tastey. Next time will oil basket as skin stuck on hot spokes and tore off when tumbling. And will also baste with sauce -non sugar based- before putting in basket.

 

If it is "tumbling" as you describe.....perhaps you should obtain several Hatch green chile peppers that are raw so they can be placed in with the chicken to tumble together side by side until a transfer occurs to wake up the dead chicken. It in turn will wake up the taste bud a bit too. When the chile pepper is turning black it would be time to remove and peel with the same fingers one uses to change your contact lens with....this will insure that the eye waters appropriately for receiving the lens.(I have done this by accident before). Of course then when peeled return it to co-mingle with the chicken....place in a hot tortilla and enjoy. There are so many side benefits to eating Hatch Green Chile. Be sure and repair those chicken escape holes so that a chile doesn't do the same....unless you of course were to use the escapees as necessary cook's sampling to insure the wanted end result.

 

-Ha. Thanks VG...Yes I plucked a few tidbits out of the fire. You caught me...
-Actually thought about putting some red peppers in there too. Enjoy the hotness of hot peppers, but regret it later. That's why I like wasabi...
-Food is becoming very expensive now. Couldn't even find oranges at our Costco...
-Thinking about a garden. That's a lot of work...
-How long could a man live off of canned beans? I mean without serious health consequences- (not to others).

 

I have a very complicated and specific recipe that goes over well.

Get some cheap red meat. Or pork,if that's what you have. Any meat. You can shoot it, or run it over or buy it at the store in the department that says "meat." The cheaper the better since this recipe makes tough meat tender. With a filet knife, slice the meat into thin(ish) sheets about 1/4" to 1/2" inch thick. Wet the sheets and roll them in a powder made of brown sugar (just a little...), garlic powder, red pepper, onion powder, a little salt and anything else you have handy. Get a good thick coating on the meat.
Stack all that onto some tinfoil and pour in some water and vinegar (if you have vinegar). A little of that liquid smoke ain't bad either, if you have some. Wrap it all up into an air tight package - the idea is to let as little of that moisture escape as possible, so just seal that stuff up with three or four layers of foil and then just put a tiny hole in the top so it doesn't explode. This is usually hunting trip food, so it's tossed in the ashes of a dying campfire for about 3 hours, but you could bake it or put in the back of a BBQ at 250 degrees or so.

What you get is some very tender and spicy meat that is more like Jamaican Jerk than BBQ.

 

Recipe two is bacon spaghetti, invented by my Jewish hunting partner Ira on the grounds that anything added to spaghetti automatically becomes Kosher. We always made it with the canned bacon they sell around here, but any bacon is fine.

It's very complicated... Take a big can of any cheap spaghetti sauce, toss in all the fried bacon you have (more is always better) and when it has simmered long enough for the bacon to become uncrispy (yup, that's a word...) pour it over the noodles. This is about the best damned spaghetti you'll ever have. It combines hundreds of years of Italian culinary wisdom with bacon. What more would you want?

 

Kodiak is going to have to market a recipe book next.....the tin foil thing sounds good to me...I like the way tin foil cooks many combinations of veggies and meat with potatoes....but sometimes on the camp fire the timing is a bit difficult for me. It is easy to overdo so I have to watch carefully one of them foil packets so I will know when the others are done. After reviewing things I am getting hungry for a camping trip just to eat campfire food. Urgh should move to the U.S. and switch to goats so he can supply one for camp meat to the rest of us once a year...we could even invite him to the meal. Years ago I used to attend camp where a whole goat would be wrapped in muslin then wrapped again in gunny sack wet down thoroughly and buried in coals for overnight........was unbelievably good and oh so tender.

 

Cut up a Keilbasa into beef Rice-a-Roni, cook according to directions. Serve with cottage cheese and fruit.