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Medieval comedians...Or What did you do in Evesham daddyKhaun

Discussion in 'Fiction' started by urqh, May 9, 2013.

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  1. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    At last...with the perimission of the management....The 4th installment of ww2forum reinactors...A story you will tell your grandchildrens grandchildren....A story long in the making...One the critics have stated to be taken twice at night and call me in the morning if it has not cleared up....Slipdigits war...The war of the forest...The Kingdom of Urqh....and now....The Battle of Evesham...

    Read it and weep...The Telegraph..

    Reap what you sow....The Daily Mail..

    Never in the Field of Human Conflict....never ever...please no....The Guardian..

    Take with a pinch of salt and lots of beer...Pravda..

    Sex, Romance, Adventure...its all somewhere else...Washington Post

    Boobs? He's made one here...The Sun

    Obama on the Moon...National Enquirer...

    Coming soon to ww2 forums...the members draw swords...lancers...horses...bows and pretty helmets that even the Germans could not match...

    Bravery will be foremost...but not for all...

    A battle of wills...hills...mills...and shrills...

    Blood and gore...Global warming has nothing on this says Gore...

    The message..??? If there is a message....Faith..Hope...Charity...none of that...just pure murder, butchery...and good musical numbers..

    Watch this space for the Dvd extras post..to follow... explaining just why...simply just why...and the theme tunes..to be found in all good record shops in Uzbekistan....

    The cast and what a cast...Such a cast Not seen since A58 last went skiing...


    Morris Men on tour..Erich..Pzjgr...symponic Poet...Phylo Roadking
    Father Prior,,,Kenthecanuk
    Sir Hugh Despenser...Ron Goldstein.
    Richard of Cornwall...King of the RomansLJAd
    Henry DeMontfort...scipio
    Man cutting grass...GT Blackwell
    General Custer Sloniksp
    Simon Demontfort....Skipper
    Henry the third....Otto
    Edward Longshanks....KodiakBeer
    Simon demontfort junior..Urqh
    Bishiop of Worcester Bishop de Cantelupe,,,Clementine
    Demontforts flag bearer Sir Guy de Balliol, ...Cac
    Washerwoman...Mcrusk
    Demontforts barber Nicholas...heraldry expert....poppy..
    .Welsh foot commander Humphrey de Bohun...Biak
    Earl of Gloucester Gilbert de Clare...Slipdigit.
    Roger de.Mortimer...Belasar..
    Tiredoldsoldier...Tiredoldsoldier
    King of France...von poop
    Bridge toll keeper..Martin Bull...
    Llywelyn ap Gruffyd, Prince of Wales...Texson
    2 monks...Jenisch and karjala
    Offenham ferry man...Ptmimms
    Robert Bruce of Scotland...Historian..
    Roving Minstrel...LRusso
    Passing tourists...A58 and FormerJughead and USMCPrice
    The Pope...Lwd
    Edward Longshanks wife Eleanor of Castille...dbf
    Demontforts wife errr....Eleanor of England sister of Henry the third...Marmat
    King Henry's wife Another flipping Eleanor..of Provence...Totenkopf
    Shepheard... Brndirt1
    Blacksmith...Fred Wilson
    Gravedigger...4th Wilts
    Town Cryer...Tamino
    Medieval Chroniceler William Risshanger...Opanapointer
    Roger de Leybourne Kings saviour...Von Noobie
    William Maltravers second kings saviour...George Patton
    Papal Legate Arnaud Amaury...Kai Petrie
    Warrin of Bassingbourne...Takao
    De Montforts army...Jagdpanther44
    Longshanks arrmy...36thID
    Referee...Rkline
    Ploughman....TD Tommy

    All rights reserved....no horses were harmed in the making of this epic....The blood though is real..
     

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    urqh, May 9, 2013
    #1
    CAC and belasar like this.
  2. KodiakBeer

    KodiakBeer Member

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    I laughed, I cried, I loved, then realized I was in the wrong theater. Still, Rochelle, Rochelle; a young girl's strange, erotic journey from Milan to Minsk was an excellent show even though the Stalin character was a little light in the valenkis if you know what I mean.
     
    KodiakBeer, May 9, 2013
    #2
  3. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    KB...You aint seen nothin yet....
     
    urqh, May 9, 2013
    #3
  4. Biak

    Biak Boy from Illinois Staff Member

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    Oh sure ! Make me an Earl then run a pike up my arse. Thank you very little.
     
    Biak, May 9, 2013
    #4
  5. KodiakBeer

    KodiakBeer Member

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    I've just been informed that I was in the correct theater after all, and what I thought was Belarusan version of Rochelle, Rochelle, was actually The Battle of Evesham performed in Scouse. While I must confess that I didn't understand a single spoken word, there was certainly a lot of acting and sword waving going on. I don't think I would be amiss in pointing out that sword waving and emotive content and tavern wenches are the heart of all good theater. I suggest you introduce more tavern wenches to complement the acting and sword waving. Bravo sir!
     
    KodiakBeer, May 9, 2013
    #5
  6. ptimms

    ptimms Member

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    It's about a 20 min drive from home to the Ferry (used to live in Evesham now Stratford way) so you'll need to give me a bit of warning if I'm going to haul anyone across the river.
     
    ptimms, May 9, 2013
    #6
  7. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    Only the Dead Pt...only the dead...
     
    urqh, May 9, 2013
    #7
  8. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    Thats his son mate...your the dad...the other Earl....You will be hanging back I'm afraid...Trying to rally the Welsh...and as we all know the Viet Taffs don't like rallying...
     
    urqh, May 9, 2013
    #8
  9. von Poop

    von Poop Waspish

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    von Poop, May 9, 2013
    #9
  10. Poppy

    Poppy grasshopper

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    I want to be Pope....How keen of you to know I have a sharp eye. Rain Man like, I'll always tell you what I see. Others may try to deceive you- but not me.
     
    Poppy, May 9, 2013
    #10
  11. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    The way it was meant to be....The big money version of the coming epic....

    http://youtu.be/Jezuw4pTpaw
     
    urqh, May 9, 2013
    #11
  12. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    The ww2 forums low budget version of whats to come..

    http://youtu.be/lfGpVcdqeS0
     
    urqh, May 9, 2013
    #12
  13. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    Otto....sorry Henry the third rallies the troops....

    Slipdigit sings Dixie somewhere in this....And Skipper buys a new suit.

    http://youtu.be/E9X6dxQ3nIk
     
    urqh, May 9, 2013
    #13
  14. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    But enough of this...Gird your loins me boys...

    Put away your toys...

    Battle calls...

    And men now asleep in England...

    Tread gently in these fields...for these fields are making history...Biak, leave Cac's horse alone...

    And now.....Its war..

    The Battle of Evesham...in two parts....Well Skipper has 6 parts to part with shortly....

    http://youtu.be/4h_zlSbhYis
     
    urqh, May 9, 2013
    #14
    CAC likes this.
  15. Poppy

    Poppy grasshopper

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    This is going to be Cecil B DeMille epic.... We called Charlton Heston, but he is unavailable.
     
    Poppy, May 9, 2013
    #15
  16. GRW

    GRW Pillboxologist WW2|ORG Editor

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    Odd's bodkins!
     
    GRW, May 9, 2013
    #16
  17. LRusso216

    LRusso216 Graybeard Staff Member

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    Hmm. A Roving Minstrel. Does that mean I just sing and tell the tale, without doing any of that nasty fighting? If so, I'll take it and watch from the sidelines and compose my lyrics while the rest of you re-enact the battle. Go to it, boys (and girls)!

    Oh, a roving minstrel I...
     
    LRusso216, May 9, 2013
    #17
  18. TD-Tommy776

    TD-Tommy776 Man of Constant Sorrow

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    I, for one, am happy to have a minor role as a ploughman. Of course, being on the south side of a horse that's heading north does have its drawbacks.


    I played a roving minstrel in a musical when I was in 9th grade. It's not so bad, Lou. You'll be popular with the ladies -- not that you aren't already. ;)
     
    TD-Tommy776, May 10, 2013
    #18
  19. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    The ploughman...owns GreenHill...the battlefield...What makes you think he's minor? Have you ever tried ploughing a field when 500 knights are charging uphill?
     
    urqh, May 10, 2013
    #19
  20. urqh

    urqh Tea drinking surrender monkey

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    Lou...Henry..Otto the third...killed his first minstrel in public at court....For being sarcastic in a song...Maybe though the second minstrel will be luckier....yeah...right...this is a ww2 forum battle...

    Battle starts Sunday...Ends Monday...There will be tears...
     
    urqh, May 10, 2013
    #20
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